Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Scented Candle

Have you ever tried to see what a scented candle tasted like? They smell so good. I mean not eat the whole thing but just a taste? I was taking my Monday long tub and I had the candles going and I tried this new bath oil. I wish I had my Monday drink but say lee vee. The room smelled great until my son “had to use it”. My two downstairs bathrooms are being redone and my master bath is the only one you can do number 2 in so I regrettably said yes. I encourage the children to go outside in the back yard when they can. Lauren likes to kill ants. My son is embarrassed because he is endowed like his real father.

Anyway now the room smells like lavender and ass and the smell of fresh poo always wins over any floral combination. So I get out prematurely. My finger tips are not even starting to look like prunes but my neck still does. I need to get that fixed.

I like how bath oils make my skin feel but not what it does to my tub. You see all of the dirt that you left behind clinging to the sides. Even if I wipe it down, there is still a bit left over. By the end of the week the kids play with the ring that is formed. Lauren likes to stick her bath time playing cards to it.

Never mind the grey ring, the tub becomes a bobsled track and I have to slide out over the side to the bathroom floor. The day I tried to get out just by standing up to grab the phone, I slipped and got a mouth full of candle. I am so glad my hair did not catch fire with all of the oil I had in it. My friend Marry got a candle stuck “you know where” and had to go to the hospital to get it out. They had to drill a whole right through the thing to release the vacuum it caused. You never see those episodes on ER. She used the “I slipped on bath oil” excuse.

She told me the story. When a few of us were over her house for a dinner party, she pointed out the candle on the table was the one that got stuck. It had a whole straight through it….

Anyway it tastes ok; lemon candles have the strongest flavor. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to grate it on my pasta, but if I was stranded on an island with scented candles I would try the other thing.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

You taste candles? LOL you are so crazy. Did you tell this to Mr E?

4:19 PM  

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